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Lunch teeth brushers at work

380,899 Views | 2665 Replies | Last: 2 mo ago by Milwaukees Best Light
aggiedoc54
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AG
I didn't know this thread was still alive. Just did a Google search for it, and it happened to be revived today.

Strong work still going on here!
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schmellba99
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schmellba99
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Dammit! I broke a major rule of engagement tonight. I had to drop a deuce at DIA. Came out of nowhere, i chalk it up to a lot of whiskey while hunting and finally being below the hard deck.
FNG
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Don't know what is up with someone in my building, but the last two mornings whilst I was occupying a stall, someone has entered the bathroom, had the auto towel dispenser push out four or five paper towels, and then they have occupied another stall.

They are in the stall for several minutes. Lots of rustling around of the paper towels. Today they were drenched in some sort of cologne that overpowered the work I was doing in that bathroom.

A few minutes later they flush and leave. I'm not sure what happened to the towels. Not enough flushes to move out brown paper towels. Maybe they stayed in the pants somewhere?

Really not sure what was happening in there.
Premium
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AG
Someone in our office building (2 stalls) puts toilet paper on the toilet. Like 3-4 layers of toilet paper. The thing that pisses me off is he LEAVES it there!!!

So when it's my "turn" to go, there is only one stall left and I better hope someone didn't piss on it.

The funny thing is I think it's my direct report but I haven't called him out on it. I'm pretty sure I just need to start making fun of "some guy" who keeps leaving the toilet paper on the toilet - saying how much it pisses me off - and maybe he will stop. Or maybe he will do it more!
Jack Cheese
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Take the passive-aggressive approach. That usually works best when in a professional setting, far better than discussing things in a straightforward manner.
Silver Arrows
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Thought this could use a bump. It's just after 10 am local time and I'm three pit stops in. Needless to say milk was a bad choice this morning.
sts7049
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jetch17 said:

and whats the deeeeal with sh*tter phone convos? the only reason you shouldbe on your phone whilst dropping one is to check email, non-picture text people, or look at mobile porn (but you run the risk of catching a bone and having your hog touch the inner rim)

otherwise, when OTHERS are on the phone in a stall, i make a concious effort to blow my ane-trumpet or flush about 8 or 9 times ina row.
one of the greatest tine board posts in history i think
jetch17
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everytime this thread bumps i get lost in a rabbit hole going all the way back to the beginning and giggling my ass off ... some good times
David_Puddy
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MouthBQ98
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AG
While we are at it, I think the smartphone is going to alter men's room architecture in the future. They're going to need to design for more ****ters per building, because dudes are spending 15-20 minutes per dump in there playing games or web browsing instead of taking 5-10 minutes to take care of business and escape the turd molecule cloud as quickly as possible. This leads to crappers being full much more often than in the past.
Jack Cheese
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MouthBQ98 said:

While we are at it, I think the smartphone is going to alter men's room architecture in the future. They're going to need to design for more ****ters per building, because dudes are spending 15-20 minutes per dump in there playing games or web browsing instead of taking 5-10 minutes to take care of business and escape the turd molecule cloud as quickly as possible. This leads to crappers being full much more often than in the past.

True. Only limiting factor is the risk of deep vein thrombosis or maybe gangrene from lounging on the crapper so long that all circulation is cut off. I hate stumbling back to my office with dead tingly feet and legs.
MouthBQ98
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Yeah, trying to look like you are walking normally with a numb unresponsive leg or two.
sts7049
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AG
well, the standing wipers have an advantage here because they get an extra 30sec (or longer depending on what you had for dinner the night before) of blood flow back before the sitters.
Caliber
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sts7049 said:

well, the standing wipers have an advantage here because they get an extra 30sec (or longer depending on what you had for dinner the night before) of blood flow back before the sitters.

Yeah, but what if you waited so long that you can barely stand up due to numb legs, like Murtaugh with the toilet bomb? I wouldn't want to do a stumbling stand with mud butt...
Bondag
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AG
I now have to walk across building to poop because the toilet closest to my office doesn't have WiFi. At least I get my steps in.
tandy miller
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Bondag said:

I now have to walk across building to poop because the toilet closest to my office doesn't have WiFi. At least I get my steps in.
It really is the little things in life
FJB
HtownAg92
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Sweet merciful crap. Just finished #3 for the morning. Combo of too late whiskey and beers watching the Stros and too much coffee and kolaches (sausage WGAF) this morning trying to recover has me living on the toilet. The consistency is dropping with each trip. Went from normal to mud to full-on spray. The next one (and I can already feel that there will be one) may just be some vapor that never even makes it to the water.
schmendeler
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HtownAg92 said:

Sweet merciful crap. Just finished #3 for the morning. Combo of too late whiskey and beers watching the Stros and too much coffee and kolaches (sausage WGAF) this morning trying to recover has me living on the toilet. The consistency is dropping with each trip. Went from normal to mud to full-on spray. The next one (and I can already feel that there will be one) may just be some vapor that never even makes it to the water.
it's going to freebase straight into your lungs.
Mookie
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AG
Just had one put his toothbrush in his back pocket after he finished brushing, then used the urinal. WTF man.
Ag_07
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Mookie said:

Just had one put his toothbrush in his back pocket after he finished brushing, then used the urinal. WTF man.

Eh...Sounds gross at first, but that's probably not any worse than dropping a deuce with your phone right there in your hands.
Flashdiaz
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Ag_07 said:

Mookie said:

Just had one put his toothbrush in his back pocket after he finished brushing, then used the urinal. WTF man.

Eh...Sounds gross at first, but that's probably not any worse than dropping a deuce with your phone right there in your hands.
I don't stick my phone directly in my mouth for 2 minutes.
Cromagnum
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People do this in my office when there can be up to 6 folks doing work I the stalls at once. Frigging nasty
gigemJTH12
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jetch17 said:

WTF is the point of flushing mid-way through a urinal pee, too? Weve got a bunch of dot Indians that do this sh*t all the time, but dont follow up with a flush after they finish draining thier Vishnu....

people beez gross.



edit: whoops i suppose this falls under Mr07's post...nevertheless!

[This message has been edited by jetch17 (edited 12/13/2010 2:18p).]
schmellba99
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An old legend comes back to life!

I visited a vendor of mine's office a few months back and went to the head before leaving. They had mouthwash and toothbrushes there, not going to lie - first thought that came into my mind was this wonderful thread.
tamuags08
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sts7049 said:

well, the standing wipers have an advantage here because they get an extra 30sec (or longer depending on what you had for dinner the night before) of blood flow back before the sitters.
I want to resurrect the standing vs. sitting wiper debate.

Cinco Ranch Aggie
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The return of a TexAgs classic!
David_Puddy
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Not working out of an office anymore, I do miss laughing at the teeth brushers in the office.
White Liberals=The Worst
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Jack Cheese said:

MouthBQ98 said:

While we are at it, I think the smartphone is going to alter men's room architecture in the future. They're going to need to design for more ****ters per building, because dudes are spending 15-20 minutes per dump in there playing games or web browsing instead of taking 5-10 minutes to take care of business and escape the turd molecule cloud as quickly as possible. This leads to crappers being full much more often than in the past.

True. Only limiting factor is the risk of deep vein thrombosis or maybe gangrene from lounging on the crapper so long that all circulation is cut off. I hate stumbling back to my office with dead tingly feet and legs.
When we were lazy out of shape college kids, my buddy and I used to take what we called "nap craps" and "dip sh*ts" when we had internships at a major oil and gas company in Houston one summer. Falling asleep for 30 minutes in a company stall and waking up with jello legs is almost rock bottom...next to tuggin one out in a bathroom stall. But it was such a boring job, and they wouldn't let us dip so I'd just go sit on a toilet, pop a dip in, and reflect on life sometimes. If I was tired or hungover, I'd sleep.
Jock 07
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Bondag said:

I now have to walk across building to poop because the toilet closest to my office doesn't have WiFi. At least I get my steps in.
imagine having to **** everyday in a classified environment where you can't even bring your phone into the building. Typically the only thing to read is the don't be rapey posters taped to the inside of the ****ter.
sts7049
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Scruffy
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Jock 07 said:

Bondag said:

I now have to walk across building to poop because the toilet closest to my office doesn't have WiFi. At least I get my steps in.
imagine having to **** everyday in a classified environment where you can't even bring your phone into the building. Typically the only thing to read is the don't be rapey posters taped to the inside of the ****ter.
draw some dicks on the posters.
have some fun.
Jack Cheese
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AG
Today whilst working in a satellite office I'm not familiar with, I dropped an offensively foul deuce. I courtesy flushed it, as these are not my normal co workers so I don't resent them enough to make them stew in my foulness.

Anyway this got-damned crapper sent out a spray when I flushed that soaked my whole sac and whatnot with poopwater. No amount of wiping can make me feel clean after that shiite. It was got-damn unpleasant and I thought you degenerates should know about it.
Noble07
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AG
I made that mistake once, and that's why I will never again execute the courtesy flush. I care about my own hygiene over the comfort of others. God forbid it got on your clothes. Consider yourself lucky.
Stat Monitor Repairman
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You got to get you a travel pack of
Baby wipes bro. Saved my ass manya time.
 
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