List of things I will do to those that line up for their beatings:

*Punches-Pretty much my go to attack. They are vicious and unblockable.
*Kicks-Just when you think you can't take anymore punches you get a kick. Usually placed near the balls or ballsack area. These are crippling and usually result in your throwing up.
*Body Slams-A rarely used but special attack of mine. Your body is driven to the ground with such force those around you will feel the earth shake. Your clothes will get dirty because it's outdoors.
*Verbal assaults-You will probably start crying when I humiliate you in front of your friends by pointing out various obvious imperfections about your body/clothes/etc. Some run away before the fight begins because of their shame.

Well, I'll take questions now...

How many Aggies can you take on at once?

Just one at a time. This is a strict rule. Honor system here guys.

Steve Dave......Rule #1. Post a picture of your hot mom.

Sorry I can't hang out longer guys. You can come over to ksufans.com later as I will be posting after I get out of school and will describe your pending ungodly humiliations in great detail.

The sock puppets, and now this!!

SD,

Could you take Snyder if you had to?

Steve Dave is awesome!

I remember you Steve Dave! You were threatening to throw me and Brodie out of the mall cuz I cut in front of you at the comic book store! It's on!!!

Don't fight him you guys, he has a yellow belt in kempo! Jesus H. Christ!!!

This guy is obviously their version of 13-0 Branding Iron.

My black belt beats your yellow belt!

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What exactly is 'romantic fist attachment'??

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I want you to know that I have a brown belt draped over the back of my futon and I have seen Never Back Down twice. TWICE. We shall meet and you shall die an awkward, sweaty, homoerotic-MMA-style death. DEATH. Your broken body shall be torn asunder and cast to the four corners of Kansas as a warning to all other Wildcats: do not taunt the Aggies. AGGIES. My mighty fists have no mercy, they are mercilessly named Justice and Harold.






HAROLD.

i was hoping this was real....what a disappointment. but damned funny!

steve dave is a perfect example of what happens to little boys who do stuff with other little boys after they grow up

This thread made my week. I couldn't stop laughing.

More Steve Dave comic gold…from the ksu thread…

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Prolly going to start about 1 or so depending on when my mom gets everything together. My posse (< ksu slang for group of badass friends) will get there around then too. I guess the line up will start at 1 and then I will start administering face and ball destruction at about 1:30 or 1:45. Not set in stone as we sometimes run late. Better shoot for 2 for the actual crushing of your nuts to for sure begin in case you want someone there to carry your unconscious carcass back to your collie-drawn-wagon.

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Hey Aggies, just another taste of what you are in for:

-My brother held up a huge stick yesterday and I punched it in half.
-One time a stray dog was chasing me home and I turned around and kicked it in the shoulder and it ran away.
-I haven't cried from getting hurt physically for 1 year and 7 months.

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When asked how big the ‘huge stick’ was…

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Huge. Like as big around as my thumb. Broke it into two pieces like it was nothing.

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When asked if he punched it or chopped it…

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Punched. Hit it dead on with the third try.

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this guy needs his own sitcom.

ROTF

what ever happened to this troll?

My teenage sons have punched through sheetrock walls many times. They are getting proficient at fixing them. Doesn't take a lot of strength for that one.

Sweet tat bro!

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Well,... we have his photo and his email address. Why not post it on craigslist?

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Wouldn't 4chan get the job done better?

judas priest, some of you people are dense

Not sure why I never posted on this thread before. Welp, here goes nothin' ... #hoping Steve Dave isn't alerted to my presence

This is one of those times that I wish I had the laughing/crying icon. Seriously, what the heck?

I'm pretty sure Steve Dave IS Ryan McCarthy

Wish this thread hadn't been brought back around. I had nearly forgotten how disappointed I was in the number of Ags who didn't pick up on this joke. This guy should be a regular contributor on realultimatefighting power.net. I can only assume like 6 electric guitars started wailing in the background as he broke through that stick.

Tell 'em, Steve Dave!

[This message has been edited by BrightAg13 (edited 5/5/2011 11:23p).]

Steve Dave might be Blood Ninja

Which is harder to understand:

1. The fact that at least a dozen Ags on page 1 thought this guy was serious, or

2. The fact that even after MULTIPLE posters pointed out that this was all sarcasm, people continued to post their observations thinking it was real?



Unbelievable. I can't imagine what their definition of "smart, dry humor" must be. These must be the people who laugh at Jim Carrey-type stuff ("HA! He made a face and then fell down!!".

Russel Crowe and Steve Dave: Fi-in raound the world

Drywall is not hard to punch through, my epileptic grandma did that during one of her fits.

This has got to be nothing more than a good joke or a 10 year old kid with mommy issues. Either way, I'm laughing my @ss off.

The trick is to uppercut while he's doing a fist pump