Don't communicate or negotiate with attorneys who don't represent you. Time to either pay up or lawyer up. I would do the latter. I'd also do my best to make sure they pay your attorneys fees and then rub their nose in it so it doesn't happen again.

Here is our POA process.

We send a form to the title company with the resale certificate for the buyer to give us their contact information and billing address.

This becomes your billing address which we send the annual bill to.

If it goes unpaid, at the 45 days mark, we send another bill and add interest.

This usually gets paid. Sometimes people take of the interest and claim they didn't get the first bill. The interest stays on their account.

If it is unpaid, we send a certified letter at the 75 day mark to the address we have on file plus the physical address plus any emails. We don't charge for the certified mail because the interest takes care of it. In no case are we waiving interest. It is easier than hearing about every reason that it went unpaid.

At around the 100 day mark, we start calling and emailing.

This process takes care of 99.9% of issues. No attorneys involved.

For the remaining cases, we file a lien. It is pretty cheap and easy with an attorney. The POA just sits and waits until the refinance or sale while continuing to send invoices and charge interest. It has probably happened once in 20 years of building Poas that someone just ghosted the POA.

There was no reason for the POA to go the route you described.

Had a very similar experience years ago. In 2008 we purchased a small house in MO for my MiL to live in. When we purchased there was nothing in the closing documents about a HOA. Never gave it a thought.

About 3 years in, we recieved a certified letter saying we owed the $75 for the 3 years of HOA dues (yes, 25 bucks a year) and like 4k in fees and penalties and that they had placed a lien on the house.

Started doing research. Knew that our Dallas address was clearly listed on all the tax records and documents. (we had told MiL that nothing important would come in the mail to the house.) Knew that there was nothing in the closing documents about an HOA. Further came to find that in MO it is very easy to place a lien, but if it is contested and they lose, the compensation started at 3 times the amount they were trying to get. This little dinky neighborhood didn't make anywhere close to that amount per year. Then we found out that the HOA was actually defunct at the time we purchased for some sort of reason.

Spent a while going back and forth with the treasurer. She wasn't willing to budge. Finally contacted the president (these were all residents on power trips) and explained the potential penalties they could face, the fact that we seemed to have an airtight argument and that we were more than willing to pay the 75 bucks, but not the 4k. If they wouldn't compromise, we would lawyer up. Once the president saw the potential downside he immediately agreed.

Since then, I know to watch for the annual notice. We don't get one some years but I know to pay it.

Moral, while HOAS are ridiculously too powerful and generally completely suck, you can fight them if they are in the wrong.