A Reading from the cHornicles

3,801 Views | 25 Replies | Last: 3 yr ago by ABATTBQ11
Bitter Old Man
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AG
3 cHornicles 20:20-31

And the word of the Del came to Her Man saying: "Go, now, and destroy the Land Thieves, do not spare them, man or woman, crying child, horse or schooner. When you are done, you shall all stand over them and sing your song to honor your gods, your people, and your great steer. You shall not depart the battlefield until your song is sung."

But Her Man had mercy on the thieves and would not utterly destroy them, for he saw them as weaker and lower ranking. He said to his men who did not want to sing: "go now to the locker room, for its hot out here and you are sad, so I support you either way." And the word of the Del came to the fat prophet saying: I regret that I have made Her Man coach, for he has turned his back from following my commandments." And the fat prophet was angry and cried all night to anyone who would listen to him.

And the Ketch went to Her Man and said: "did not the Del command you to destroy the thieves and sing your song? Why then did you not obey?" And Her Man replied "I have sinned, I did not obey because I fear the people and what they might say about me. Please return to my side and speak words of encouragement to the people about me." The fat prophet replied: "I shall not return to your side, for the Del has rejected you from being coach over the steers. He shall tear this kingdom from you and give it to one whom I proclaim as better than you, which is probably Nick Saban or Vince Lombardi."

Her Man then cried out to the Del: "What of my fortunes? Will you still pay me? For I have many concubines and medicine men to pay my debts to!" And the Del replied: "Yes. For you still have the extended contract. "

And it was so.
goodAg80
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The tribes wandered thence for 40 years.
MROD92
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I have been hoping for another installment. A+ as always
Madman
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goodAg80 said:

The tribes wandered thence for 40 years.

40 acres is really big, they might need 80 years.
PneumAg
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Can we get a running thread with links to every installment of this? It's just so gold.
elfurioso92
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So shall it be in the time of Del.

Once again, nicely done.
Maroon Skittles
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Bitter Old Man said:

3 cHornicles 20:20-31

Her Man then cried out to the Del: "What of my fortunes? Will you still pay me? For I have many concubines and medicine men to pay my debts to!" And the Del replied: "Yes. For you still have the extended contract. "



Her Man then lamented, "What of the kissing of young men? Will I still be able to fulfill my sacred duty?". And the Del replied, "No. This task will now fall to the people of the steer."

And it was so.


AgCat93
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Bitter Old Man
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PneumAg said:

Can we get a running thread with links to every installment of this? It's just so gold.
There was one at one time, but as with everything here, it has fallen to the depths of OR History...
goodAg80
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cHornicles I
cHornicles 2
cHornicles 3
cHornicles 4
cHornicles 5
JustisWalkert
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And behold there was much weeping and gnashing of teeth in the kingdom of Sodom.
45-70Ag
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The fat prophet..........lol
HTownAg98
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Quote:

The Chuck is my shepherd, I shall not win.
He makes me lie down in dorm rooms with coaches,
He leads me into quiet stadiums.
He restores the T in Texas, and leads me in a path to righteousness for his Core Values' sake.

Yay though I walk through the valley of empty seats,
I shall fear no third down.
Jerrod and your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare an explanation before me, but
In the presence of the media, their ears cannot understand.
Your kickers hands and feet are anointed with oil.
The boos overflow.
But surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,
Because "We're Texas!"
And I shall dwell in the conference of Dodds forever.

This one is still the best.
ccatag
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The cHornicles are ancient scrolls, are they not?
Slight amendment ...

A Reading of the scrolls from the cHornicles
33
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Madman said:

goodAg80 said:

The tribes wandered thence for 40 years.

40 acres is really big, they might need 80 years.
One of us has wandered for 80 years already.
"So long as an opinion is strongly rooted in the feelings, it gains rather than loses in stability by having a preponderating weight of argument against it."

- John Stuart Mill, 1869
Bitter Old Man
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33 said:

Madman said:

goodAg80 said:

The tribes wandered thence for 40 years.

40 acres is really big, they might need 80 years.
One of us has wandered for 80 years already.
And the other is just getting started. What's your point?
AgEng06
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33 said:

Madman said:

goodAg80 said:

The tribes wandered thence for 40 years.

40 acres is really big, they might need 80 years.
One of us has wandered for 80 years already.

Speaking of, where is BaylorDub?
33
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Bitter Old Man said:

33 said:

Madman said:

goodAg80 said:

The tribes wandered thence for 40 years.

40 acres is really big, they might need 80 years.
One of us has wandered for 80 years already.
And the other is just getting started. What's your point?

One is fact and the other is conjecture.
"So long as an opinion is strongly rooted in the feelings, it gains rather than loses in stability by having a preponderating weight of argument against it."

- John Stuart Mill, 1869
goodAg80
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33 said:

Bitter Old Man said:

33 said:

Madman said:

goodAg80 said:

The tribes wandered thence for 40 years.

40 acres is really big, they might need 80 years.
One of us has wandered for 80 years already.
And the other is just getting started. What's your point?

One is fact and the other is conjecture.
I am so happy you have that to hold on to.
33
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goodAg80 said:

33 said:

Bitter Old Man said:

33 said:

Madman said:

goodAg80 said:

The tribes wandered thence for 40 years.

40 acres is really big, they might need 80 years.
One of us has wandered for 80 years already.
And the other is just getting started. What's your point?

One is fact and the other is conjecture.
I am so happy you have that to hold on to.
goodAg, you're always happy for me. Thanks.
"So long as an opinion is strongly rooted in the feelings, it gains rather than loses in stability by having a preponderating weight of argument against it."

- John Stuart Mill, 1869
Rec
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AG
Ketchum and Gomorrah
goodAg80
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Rec said:

Ketchum and Gomorrah
Worse than being sodomized.
Rec
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goodAg80 said:

Rec said:

Ketchum and Gomorrah
Worse than being sodomized.


You get turned into a pillar of chicken wings
AledoAg86
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Rec said:

goodAg80 said:

Rec said:

Ketchum and Gomorrah
Worse than being sodomized.


You get turned into a pillar of chicken wings
LMAO!
Born Maroon
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Did he say "Blessed are the Cheesemakers?"

Jock 07
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45-70Ag said:

The fat prophet..........lol

AKA the prophet of girth
ABATTBQ11
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Bitter Old Man said:

3 cHornicles 20:20-31

And the word of the Del came to Her Man saying: "Go, now, and destroy the Land Thieves, do not spare them, man or woman, crying child, horse or schooner.


Home run on the first line
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