I'm attempting to get a family member on the right track, they've been unemployed a few years but exceptional degree.... I think they need an environment change.


Has anyone here had success with bringing family into your business?

What tips would you recommend?

This is a big change for us and I hope it is as successful as I imagine it can be for myself and them.

Thanks in advance.

I'm expanding my businesses into some ancillary services, refurbished appliances, appliance repair and maintenance, and potentially small engine repair in new venture with some local partners I've been working with for a few years.

I figure he will shadow me, basically as an assistant, helping me around the house and helping with raising my little girl, freeing up my wife and I to be able to enjoy a little but more free time. He will watch me start a new business from the ground up and get hands on with new skillsets.

It's a year long attempt to see if I can get him confidence back and show him how opportunity if bountiful if you know how to look.

I don't care if he works for me forever or just a year or less.... I needed to get him out of the parents house, he was too comfortable. Comfort is the enemy of progress.

I've asked him many times to work for me, and he finally said yes, and that he trusts me with his time. I feel like I can shoulder the additional burden.

I was blessed with a family member who took a chance on me, and I feel obligated to pass it forward.

I appreciate your guidance though.

My family owns several businesses. The third generation is running them. The fourth generation does not want a part in running the business except I would be willing to give time, but not my full-time life which it would require.

Working in a business with family is tough. You are around them all the time. Well at least I was when I worked with my parents for a year.

I know you have high hopes for the family member but you need to be prepared to do all of his work plus yours and he's going to still expect to be paid. He might prove a miracle and it all work out, but with his poor performance at working so far I wouldn't set expectations very high. Just be realistic that what you are going to get out of him work wise isn't going to amount to much.

harrierdoc said:

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3. You bring this person on, train them up, and realize, "Hey, they are pretty good". Then, they up and leave you because you aren't paying them enough, aren't giving them the vacation they want, etc...

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Wait they are family and an employee, not an indentured servant. I wouldn't call this point a bad thing necessarily.

I didn't say they shouldn't be able to do that, but I'm thinking something like taking for granted the opportunity provided. Kind of like complaining of not getting every holiday off, not getting the same amount of vacation the boss gets, etc...

administrative errors said:

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I'm expanding my businesses into some ancillary services, refurbished appliances, appliance repair and maintenance, and potentially small engine repair in new venture with some local partners I've been working with for a few years.

I figure he will shadow me, basically as an assistant, helping me around the house and helping with raising my little girl, freeing up my wife and I to be able to enjoy a little but more free time. He will watch me start a new business from the ground up and get hands on with new skillsets.

It's a year long attempt to see if I can get him confidence back and show him how opportunity if bountiful if you know how to look.

I don't care if he works for me forever or just a year or less.... I needed to get him out of the parents house, he was too comfortable. Comfort is the enemy of progress.

I've asked him many times to work for me, and he finally said yes, and that he trusts me with his time. I feel like I can shoulder the additional burden.

I was blessed with a family member who took a chance on me, and I feel obligated to pass it forward.

I appreciate your guidance though.

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Someone I'm close with hired a family member "just until they get another job" and that has turned into 3 years and counting. He's currently overpaid, and under-qualified to get jobs at other companies with the same pay.

Only you know if it's the best thing to do, but realize you may have to make a tough decision after one year. Make sure you don't overpay him or y'all will be trapped together.

Kind of seems like you've already made up your mind

One of the main watch-outs is the impact on your other employees. Sometimes a risk that seems like it can be self-contained (ie you think handle this guy) can bring a host of unintended consequences (resentment, slacking by others if they perceive favoritism)

Hope for the best, prepare for the worst and realize that not everything is about dollars and cents. Protect yourself, communicate all the time, be upfront with expectation ms and hold them accountable as you would any employee

leoj said:

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Kind of seems like you've already made up your mind

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Yeah i've already committed the time to mentor and train him verbally, and I plan to follow through. I was asking for experiential advice on best practices (not whether or not I should or should not hire family).

Keeper of The Spirits said:

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Hope for the best, prepare for the worst and realize that not everything is about dollars and cents. Protect yourself, communicate all the time, be upfront with expectation ms and hold them accountable as you would any employee

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I hope to set proper standards, expectations, consequences and incentives to promote the character i want to see.

Quote:

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Kind of seems like you've already made up your mind

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Yeah i've already committed the time to mentor and train him verbally, and I plan to follow through. I was asking for experiential advice on best practices (not whether or not I should or should not hire family).

Quote:

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Seems like an administrative error to hire family...

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hence... executive functions aren't my strong suit.

Stop by McDonald's and pick up an application for him. What you need to know will be reflected in his response.

I recruited a family member away from their successful position for one of my companies. That worked out as planned but therein lies the answer I would give to your question. Would you target and recruit this person if they weren't family? Go with the answer to that question.

If he needs to get out of his parents house that is a boundaries/enabling issue. I agree with others that this is not a good idea, but I do admire your desire to help.

In my experience there's always a fog that comes with family members working together. Hopefully you can get him moving in the right direction, but to him, it may not seem real in a way. I do admire your intentions here, money be damned.

Lol, username checks out.

I think helping the family member land a job elsewhere would be the best you could do. If you're not sure about bringing your family member on after knowing them so well, doesn't that tell you all you need to know?

This does sound like a risky deal you're getting into...but...it's family...logic and reason sometimes take a backseat there.

Congratulations for stepping up like this. I wish you luck.

I'd suggest setting up a quarterly sit down meeting, maybe over lunch or something, where you discuss a few defined/written down topics.

Off the top of my head:
1. Attendance - does he show up EVERY DAY and ON TIME?
2. Focus - is he actively engaged on a daily basis? Does he spend too much time on the phone, or otherwise distracted?
3. Effort - is he putting forth the right amount of effort? does he loaf? does he not take on tasks that he should be doing, instead hoping that you or someone else will do them?
4. Dedication - does he want to be there? If not, what other options is he looking into?

I'd think some formal structure for a regular conversation would be good. I subscribe to the idea that what gets measured gets improved.

Och26-58-87 said:

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administrative errors said:

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I'm expanding my businesses into some ancillary services, refurbished appliances, appliance repair and maintenance, and potentially small engine repair in new venture with some local partners I've been working with for a few years.

I figure he will shadow me, basically as an assistant, helping me around the house and helping with raising my little girl, freeing up my wife and I to be able to enjoy a little but more free time. He will watch me start a new business from the ground up and get hands on with new skillsets.

It's a year long attempt to see if I can get him confidence back and show him how opportunity if bountiful if you know how to look.

I don't care if he works for me forever or just a year or less.... I needed to get him out of the parents house, he was too comfortable. Comfort is the enemy of progress.

I've asked him many times to work for me, and he finally said yes, and that he trusts me with his time. I feel like I can shoulder the additional burden.

I was blessed with a family member who took a chance on me, and I feel obligated to pass it forward.

I appreciate your guidance though.

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You should seriously reconsider this - especially as he's been out of work for so long. Big, big red flag here.

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I'm with this guy. Letting the jergoff dilly with small engines is one thing...but exposing your little girl to unknowns is just plain stupid

Had this situation in our family. Agree with the poster that mentioned quarterly meetings. Set expectations early and enforce them strictly so there is a definition of the boundaries you set as an employer/employee.

Be wary of others feeling that the family member is getting special treatment. This happened a lot in our situation and its a hard presumption to overcome. Some people take jobs with connections and fight hard to prove they are worth the confidence. Others take advantage. Be on the lookout for your mentee's view on this as it can hurt him in the future if he has subordinates who used to work for you and respected your work ethic.

I'd be wary of the role as babysitter. It blurs the lines of your relationship in this role and lends to the idea that he'll get a pass and some special treatment. If you want to help him, he needs a boss, not a buddy.

In our case, the business that the family member was trusted with after a similar period of mentoring and shadowing failed and cost the family (and other partners) significantly. He now must provide for himself and is doing much better.

Agree. Definitely set out job roles and expectations.

Do not expect him to be a housekeeper or a babysitter. If you need some outside of you to fill these roles hire someone on an as needed or part time basis.

If you mix his job with your personal life it will definitely be hard to remove him if necessary.

Also if he is not meeting expectations and you are already meeting with him monthly, I would meet more frequently and provide written goals/expectations that he can meet. You need to really spell out what work he is doing for you, your expectations and what outcomes you are looking for. You might also make sure you explain the outcome for not only success, but failure.

You will probably need to be very hands on and involved with his work (micro-manager) if he hasn't had luck in holding a job.

Zemira said:

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Agree. Definitely set out job roles and expectations.

Do not expect him to be a housekeeper or a babysitter. If you need some outside of you to fill these roles hire someone on an as needed or part time basis.

If you mix his job with your personal life it will definitely be hard to remove him if necessary.

Also if he is not meeting expectations and you are already meeting with him monthly, I would meet more frequently and provide written goals/expectations that he can meet. You need to really spell out what work he is doing for you, your expectations and what outcomes you are looking for. You might also make sure you explain the outcome for not only success, but failure.

You will probably need to be very hands on and involved with his work (micro-manager) if he hasn't had luck in holding a job.

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My instincts, which i follow all too quickly for better or worse, lead me to believe that creating a clan type business (clan/adhocracy/market/hierarchy) model for my ventures would be best for my current experiences and skill-sets.

I think my first step is to find the best people to fill my weaknesses. I think my family member can fulfill some of those holes, and help me expand my offerings at the same time by filling in my absences to a degree while i get new businesses operational, which he has found some interest to learn new skillsets and practical knowledge that he's missing.

my business is retail, i'm somewhat used to turnover and making new hires, but i finally have tenured staff which makes life so much easier... i know the risks, I think i've got a decent plan in my head, there's always a major chance I'll fail and everything will fall apart that I've built.... but I can also imagine doing nothing and that doesn't appeal to me at all. I can deal with risky ventures, I think i thrive chasing them the most.

If anyone has further advice I'd love to steal your thoughts.

Thanks to everyone who's posted so far I truly appreciate the good thoughts and experience.

Seen friends and family do business. Sometimes good. Sometimes real ugly. One of my family members has a saying...

The better the friend
The closer the kin
The deeper they stick it in.

Yeah, I get it.

If I listened to most of you it would be a self-fulfilling prophecy, failure!

I get it.

Gotta assume I won't fail, otherwise there'd be no point in attemping this endeavor.

Instead of commenting on the average failure rate of such moves, please contribute something positive, that might be beneficial, even if unlikely to succeed.

My thoughts, for what they are worth.

Your family member might turn out to be everything you could dream of. A workhorse, a problem solver, a theoretician and a get-****-done guy all wrapped up in one package. The rest of your work force could still get bitter and start leaving if you don't manage the situation right.

My number one piece of advice has two parts. First, only give him responsibilities he has earned. Second, if he is earning new responsibilities, make sure the rest of your workforce gets plenty of opportunity to experience for themselves that he IS earning it.

As you make decisions, imagine that you're an employee with 5 or 10 years with the company (or at least industry) and you're the one who is watching the owner's cousin or whatever get things that you want. Hopefully you can avoid real conflicts of that sort. As you mentioned, developing that core of dependable, experienced people is difficult and important. You're the owner and you have every right to do whatever you want, but by the same token your employees have every right to think that they are being treated unfairly and react accordingly.

Two thoughts from my own career:
I was a high performer at my first job, but like nearly all high performers at that company I left in under two years. The intensely nepotistic culture choked out opportunities for growth. As a result, their executives all had the same last name, their middle management were largely second rate, and their worker bees turned over at 30-50% annually in a white collar environment.

At each place i have worked, there are people who I would rather pay to sit in a room alone doing nothing than let work for free. Their actions cost the company more money than they are paid. Sometimes they waste other people's time, sometimes they drive good people away, sometimes they are incompetent, sometimes they simply have terrible ideas and the willpower to bring those ideas to life. Something to keep in mind.

That's wonderful to hear, thank you for your perspective.

Anyone else worked for a bad (or good) family business? Perspective?