Don't mind me while I dear diary and do some internal reflection. I just spent the last 6 years as a technical lead for the first time, I was given nothing but fresh college new hires thanks a previous round of voluntary layoffs that saw nearly all of our experienced personnel walk out. I had to sit and train each of these extremely bright engineers while fending off upper management from schedule pressure. I would take the lickings during earned value meetings and did my best not to flow that frustration onto the team. Their job was hard enough as it was. Didn't want them to feel the weight of the program on their shoulders. Every one of them became rockstars and other programs outside of mine would seek them out for help.
In the past six years, I've taken 2 vacations…which I took my work laptop/phone and was basically on call when someone needed me. I missed several wedding anniversaries due to work travel. And I'll be honest, my marriage took a beating. I suppose that's what happens when you aren't taking weekends off (okay, I take sundays off) for years.
My program has been wildly successful. We've always been the black sheep of the company, but now we are about to become top dog. My team carried the program across the finish line. I've lost count of the number of potential program ending technical issues that came up that my team solved single handedly. I carried much of that weight personally and never told the team just how difficult their work actually was. Figured it was better if they didn't know they were working the impossible. Seeing us overcome all these issues has been the second most rewarding thing I've ever done. The most rewarding thing has been to see my guys grow into the engineers they are today.
And I've decided to walk away from it, move out of town, and take up an analyst job. No workers under me. No programmatic responsibilities. I get to move out of state and closer to my family. The last 6 years were the best years of my carrier. I proved myself capable in ways I never thought before. It honestly feels like I'm going into witness protection. My new team has no idea what I just did. And probably never will. What happens now?
TLDR:
I'm burnt the **** out and need something new. I'm hoping taking a break from the high pressure job duties will re-invigorate me, but I'm worried about what that will mean for my career in the future.
In the past six years, I've taken 2 vacations…which I took my work laptop/phone and was basically on call when someone needed me. I missed several wedding anniversaries due to work travel. And I'll be honest, my marriage took a beating. I suppose that's what happens when you aren't taking weekends off (okay, I take sundays off) for years.
My program has been wildly successful. We've always been the black sheep of the company, but now we are about to become top dog. My team carried the program across the finish line. I've lost count of the number of potential program ending technical issues that came up that my team solved single handedly. I carried much of that weight personally and never told the team just how difficult their work actually was. Figured it was better if they didn't know they were working the impossible. Seeing us overcome all these issues has been the second most rewarding thing I've ever done. The most rewarding thing has been to see my guys grow into the engineers they are today.
And I've decided to walk away from it, move out of town, and take up an analyst job. No workers under me. No programmatic responsibilities. I get to move out of state and closer to my family. The last 6 years were the best years of my carrier. I proved myself capable in ways I never thought before. It honestly feels like I'm going into witness protection. My new team has no idea what I just did. And probably never will. What happens now?
TLDR:
I'm burnt the **** out and need something new. I'm hoping taking a break from the high pressure job duties will re-invigorate me, but I'm worried about what that will mean for my career in the future.