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How much longer to take it

4,603 Views | 20 Replies | Last: 3 yr ago by combat wombat™
ShoulderClod08
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I really enjoy what I do and the team I work with, but recently things just seem to be going a little too far. Since Covid started, the stress levels have increased with the ups and downs of openings and closings. Along with that, I get a lot of unprofessional emails and phone calls from our own reps to the point that I have had to start anxiety meds and I take my blood pressure regularly during the day. The last few weeks, I have had a continuing headache that I am sure is from my blood pressure. I wake up at night feeling hot and can't sleep.
I just don't know what else is out there. I cannot relocate due to family, but open to commute or travel. Today, really got to me as I was yelled at and cussed at on a conference call.

Just not sure what advice is out there.
OnlyForNow
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I wouldn't make any rash decisions but I wouldn't put up with that and I'd immediately be looking for something else.
JamesPShelley
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Sounds to me like you are putting up with too much ***** Why aren't you "calling" out the *******s that cause you such grief? Your health is more important than a paycheck.

My wife, who has taken my advice and for her it has proven quite fruitful, would suggest you march up to the *******s... and own them asking them, "Why", and not settling for any bull**** responses.

Do you have any egges lined up that would permit you to walk? Have you applied for any other jobs?

My wife has walked from three jobs where the owner or her associated were being dicks... and not before telling them to FO.

Best wishes on your outcome.

Sims
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I agree with OnlyForNow.

I left a pretty rough situation in 2019 for a job that turned out to be great and exactly what I was looking for - then I was laid off in August of 2020 and have been out of work since.

Looking back, I still would leave the rough situation but it would be a lot tougher given the prospect of unemployment. I would definitely get something lined up first, even if it wasn't exactly what I wanted.
ShoulderClod08
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I don't have anything lined up. I have been applying, but nothing is available especially in my location.

Trust me on I won't don't anything rash. I also cannot tell these people off. They are protected by the current president and that person is known to go after people and get rid of them for BS stuff.
$240 Worth of Pudding
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Where do you live? What do you do? What skills/work history do you have?
FancyKetchup14
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I've been there, it's no fun. Start looking around and exploring your network/here, but it sounds like you need to make a jump yesterday. Focus on hobbies outside of work to escape. Photography. Workout. Read or write. Start training in boxing or Jiu Jitsu (worked wonders for me). Take your clubs in the car and hit the driving range after work. Regardless if I love my job or hate it, I would never let work be the source of my happiness.

If it gets too bad, analyze your financial situation and see if there's enough security to leave even if it means being unemployed for some time. However, it is always easier to find work when you're employed vs not.

It will be great to tell those people to kindly go f themselves some day. Keep your head up and hang in there. Good luck amigo.
texAZtea
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Telling people off, even when you're 100% in the right, always costs you something. I've never seen someone pull it off and come out of it smelling like roses. Those of you that have done it know something I don't.
zooguy96
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When I've told people off (even when right), it usually has backfired on me eventually, either by a toxic work environment, being given extra work, etc. The one time it did work was when I had an understanding supervisor who actually listened. Too often, most supervisors don't want to find the root of why something is happening.
I know a lot about a little, and a little about a lot.
ShoulderClod08
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The backfiring is on point and I learned my lesson already from that.

ShoulderClod08
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Do you have an email I can send to?
Capitol Ag
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texAZtea said:

Telling people off, even when you're 100% in the right, always costs you something. I've never seen someone pull it off and come out of it smelling like roses. Those of you that have done it know something I don't.
it's not about "telling people off". Asking a person to tell you their concerns more respectfully is fine. It is how you word it and keeping your composure. But, one should at the very least stand up for one's self, no doubt.
Oh Four Five
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Capitol Ag said:

texAZtea said:

Telling people off, even when you're 100% in the right, always costs you something. I've never seen someone pull it off and come out of it smelling like roses. Those of you that have done it know something I don't.
it's not about "telling people off". Asking a person to tell you their concerns more respectfully is fine. It is how you word it and keeping your composure. But, one should at the very least stand up for one's self, no doubt.
Agree with this completely. It's about how you frame the conversation with the person.

Couple of initial thoughts from me. First, assuming you're working from home, evaluate how you're set up. If you don't have a dedicated area that's work-only, I'd try to set one up. At the end of the day, close the door and do your best to leave work there. Taking a walk or getting in a quick workout at the end of the day will do wonders as well.

Second, if you have an HR rep, make sure he/she is aware of the issue. Document days/times/issues that are impacting your ability to do your work.

Third, try to understand what's driving their behaviors. It's likely they are under pressure from elsewhere, are highly stressed also, and are taking it out on you and whomever else they can. If you can see their perspective, it'll be easier to figure out how to approach them without pissing anybody off.
texAZtea
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Capitol Ag said:

texAZtea said:

Telling people off, even when you're 100% in the right, always costs you something. I've never seen someone pull it off and come out of it smelling like roses. Those of you that have done it know something I don't.
it's not about "telling people off". Asking a person to tell you their concerns more respectfully is fine. It is how you word it and keeping your composure. But, one should at the very least stand up for one's self, no doubt.
Ok, yes. I was trying to caution against doing something rash like it seemed to me others were suggesting they had done.

I am in the middle of a similar situation as OP and have had to control my temper daily. Maybe the advice was more for myself than them. But even then, if someone is in the mental state to be treating you terribly, anything that suggests they're wrong about something would tend to set them off as no one likes to face the fact they may not be right.
Dill-Ag13
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I am 100% in the same boat as you. Lean environment, oil and gas, I'm overworked and over stressed. I'm aggressively searching for something better.
ATM9000
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ShoulderClod08 said:

I don't have anything lined up. I have been applying, but nothing is available especially in my location.

Trust me on I won't don't anything rash. I also cannot tell these people off. They are protected by the current president and that person is known to go after people and get rid of them for BS stuff.

When I was younger, I'd have thought the same thing, but I'm going to turn the tables on this one to perhaps help your perspective on it?

If somebody cussed and yelled at you on the phone, obviously that's obnoxious, wrong, unprofessional... and pretty stupid of them. It is a tell though: it means your job and output are pretty damn important to them. You shouldn't do anything rash or do the same thing back, but you should have no problem saying the matter isn't appropriate to that person or the president. You need to speak up about this or you are doing a disservice to yourself, your company... and possibly the other individual involved. It is everyone's job to make sure a culture is working ok... and that means you aren't doing your part if you don't raise your hand when something inappropriate like this happens.

$240 Worth of Pudding
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ShoulderClod08 said:

Do you have an email I can send to?


Why don't you post some general info here on the thread? A lot more eyes on it that way. If after that, someone here thinks they can help, then move to the email/resume" phase.
$30,000 Millionaire
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Where do you work where people are cursing at you and what is their role / your role where they believe that is even remotely justified?
evestor1
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We've all been cussed. But have you had your life threatened? That's when you know your working in oil and gas!


Easiest way to combat bs is to quit caring. Do your job and laugh off the ruckus.
Ogre09
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People treat you the way you let them treat you
combat wombat™
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$30,000 Millionaire said:

Where do you work where people are cursing at you and what is their role / your role where they believe that is even remotely justified?


Seriously. I don't know what sort of power the person who is cursing at you has over you, but if you can calmly and tactfully tell them that you can to continue the conversation when they are calm and not screaming at, then you do it.

I don't deal well with people screaming at me.
combat wombat™
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evestor1 said:

We've all been cussed. But have you had your life threatened? That's when you know your working in oil and gas!


Easiest way to combat bs is to quit caring. Do your job and laugh off the ruckus.


Is that you, Peter?
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