Long story short, my soon-to-be fiancee has been battling cancer in some form or fashion for years and she got bad news last night.

I'm still holding out hope because I do believe in the power of God and His miracles. But I know it's not fair to myself if I also don't deal with the fact there's a very real chance she won't be with me.

I don't know where to begin. Any bible versus to suggest for such a life-altering event? Anything that has worked for any of you in the past?

More importantly, what can I do for her? To make her feel better?

I've never felt so low in my life and I just don't know what the point of anything is anymore.

Edit: I don't mean that last sentence to mean that I am a danger to myself. I just meant that the "why?" is killing me.

Very sorry to hear this.

Romans 8:28

Sorry to hear.
What's her name?

Will lift her up in prayer.

Prayers for God's peace and healing. Focus on loving God and her and not on the why. And I agree with Romans 8:28. Feel free to pm me or text me at 4096566571 if you get down.

So sorry to hear this. We will certainly pray for her.

Amen.

Prayers for you and your fiancee during this difficult time.

Rock, I am so sorry to hear this, I'll be praying for her and you.

Are y'all involved at a local church near you? I think it will be vital to have the support (spiritual and practical) of Christian brothers and sisters nearby.

Isaiah 41:10
Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness

John 14 1-4

1 Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.
2 In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.
3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also.

Matthew 10: 29-31
29 Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father.
30 But the very hairs of your head are all numbered.
31 Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.

I lost a very good friend very recently. I'm praying that your situation will be different and that you will be rejoicing instead of grieving soon.

To use your phrase, the "why" is killing me too. Even though I cannot understand it (Isaiah 55:8-9), I know God is good and worthy of praise (Isaiah 40:25-28), and sometimes that's all I can do.

Pray for healing, and know that the Lord who created all things, who made your fiancee in His image is good, and we have hope in that whether we leave this cursed world sooner or later.

I pray for healing and health for your fianc. I also pray for God's will to be done in your lives and that he will give you both the grace you require to fulfill that will.

Having said that, I am sorry that you are having to go through this suffering.

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I just meant that the "why?" is killing me.

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It's been 10 years since cancer took my Dad and thy "why" sometime still gets to me. It still comes and goes, but over time it does get better and easier to deal with these things. Cherish and make the most of the time you have now. I still regret that I could have done more with my Dad while he was here.

Sorry to here. My mom is battling as well, and things don't look good at this point. It seems there's not much comfort in these situations. Our purpose is probably to be there for them. May God strengthen you for His purposes.

Ah crap I accidentally erased everything when I was editing. Anyway, thank you all so much. I'll go into more detail later when she's laying down.

I'm praying for healing and a celebration

Sorry to hear about everything you are going through.

Not sure if this makes things any better, but wanted to share a sermon with you that we had at our church this past Sunday. I have been going through some tough times myself and had a bit of a break down Saturday morning while doing my morning devotional. I always pray after I read my devotional in the morning, and the prayer turned to crying and begging the lord to ease my burden.

I went to church the next morning and this just happened to be the sermon. I can't tell you that there is some big revelation in there about why we suffer. It did make me feel better for some reason to know that Christians all throughout history have been called to suffer, including Jesus himself. Almost like in some weird way, it made me feel like I wasn't alone, and that a bunch of good strong Christians have gone through the same suffering.

Anyway, hope it speaks to you the same way it did to me.

Will keep you in my prayers.

http://www.hpumc.org/sermon/when-bad-things-happensanctuary/#video

One more thing to add, something that has helped me deal with grief is venting and being "real" with God when I pray. I came to the realization at some point that God can handle us being mad at him and being disappointed (he knows we are whether we express it or not). Not to say that I sit there and chew God out, but I let out a little more steam then I used to and am honest about how I'm feeling and what I don't understand.

God Bless.

Prayers for you both.

Prayers for you and all the family involved.

The most thoughtful and meaningful exposition on the role of suffering in our lives that I have found is a letter from St. John Paul entitled Salvific Dolores (The Saving Power of Suffering). I think it enables us to move into a space where we acknowledge our hurt and understand that God is OK with us being frustrated/angry/broken in our lack of understanding and directing that energy at Him. (He's got big shoulders. )

This is an easier to read summary that may make the longer work more meaningful. Summary

RockTXAggie -


I hurt with you bro. Take walks by yourself in nature and cry out to God letting him know exactly how you feel and what you are thinking. Pray for her healing, but most importantly beg God to not let this cancer be wasted! Around September of last year my pastor's sister was diagnosed and this was her prayer request.

This gave me a new way to pray for my sister. Of course I also prayed for healing, hope, understanding and her kids. My sister died in November of last year. The night she passed I picked up her journal and it was filled with raw emotion, scripture, and her last entry was her good-bye to this world entry. In this entry was a call for everyone to consider the claims of Jesus and to take Him seriously. This entry was read at her funeral.

God answered the prayer to not let the cancer be wasted although He chose not to heal her in this life. Watching her in so much pain wasting away was the most difficult think I've seen in this life. However God is faithful and she cashed in on all of His promises. So much more of Romans 8 is a treasure of hope during this time. Here's just a taste...


9 However, you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. But if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Him. 10 If Christ is in you, though the body is dead because of sin, yet the spirit is alive because of righteousness. 11 But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you.
12 So then, brethren, we are under obligation, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh 13 for if you are living according to the flesh, you must die; but if by the Spirit you are putting to death the deeds of the body, you will live. 14 For all who are being led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. 15 For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, "Abba! Father!" 16 The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, heirs also, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him so that we may also be glorified with Him.
18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us. 19 For the anxious longing of the creation waits eagerly for the revealing of the sons of God. 20 For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of Him who subjected it, in hope 21 that the creation itself also will be set free from its slavery to corruption into the freedom of the glory of the children of God. 22 For we know that the whole creation groans and suffers the pains of childbirth together until now. 23 And not only this, but also we ourselves, having the first fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our body.

How are you holding up?

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I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.
- Romans 8:18

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I was doing a rea the Bible in a year plan several years ago and the morning after I hit the lowest emotional point in my life to date the passage for the morning was lamentations 3. It has stuck with me as a source of comfort ever since and I pray it can do the same for you. Specifically lamentations 3:15-24

""He has filled me with bitterness; he has sated me with wormwood. He has made my teeth grind on gravel, and made me cower in ashes; my soul is bereft of peace; I have forgotten what happiness is; so I say, "My endurance has perished; so has my hope from the Lord." Remember my affliction and my wanderings, the wormwood and the gall! My soul continually remembers it and is bowed down within me. But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will hope in him.""

Redemptive suffering. It is the "why".

AI am so sorry to hear about your situation. "I know the Fathers' will is ultimately for our good. I will start with Jeremiah 28:11. "I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not harm you. Plans to to give you hope and a future."

There is nothing stronger than praying Gods' word back to him. These are promises that God has made to His children. I highly recommend looking up many verses in the Bible where He promises healing. Write these versus down on note cards and EVERY day pray these versus back to The Father thanking Him for His love and thanking Him for His healing. Remind The Father every day of His promises to His children. The Father loves for us to come BOLDLY before His Throne with faith and expectation that He will do what He has promised. Be sure and come before His Throne with a humble heart and greatfull attitude.
Always remember, The Father answers heart prayers. It is your love for your fiance' that moves The Father to action. I would also recommend fasting. It does not have to be for long periods of time. It can be a meal or two. When we fast, we are humbling ourselves before The Father. That kind of faith and love touches The Fathers' heart like nothing else.

God Bless....Peace