helloimustbegoing said:

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Burdizzo said:

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I do a lot of work with my son's BSA Troop and have to send out emails via a platform that has everyone's address in the database. Long story short is that because of how our email blast platform is set up, most emails go to the dad and only sometimes the mom. I am addressing that technical aspect with our communication volunteer. But the dad seems to be in capable of forwarding information to his ex-wife and vice versa. I sent an email last night and he replied "Can you also send this to Johnny's mom?" This happens pretty frequently.

In the future we are copying both parents, but is it unusual for divorced parents to be this stubborn about not discussing how to coparent?

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Write back to the dad that you'll tell the ex-wife tonight in person.

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He already has an idea of my opinion of her. I described her to another person as, "If I were married to her, she would be my ex-wife too."

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I do a lot of work with my son's BSA Troop and have to send out emails via a platform that has everyone's address in the database. Long story short is that because of how our email blast platform is set up, most emails go to the dad and only sometimes the mom. I am addressing that technical aspect with our communication volunteer. But the dad seems to be in capable of forwarding information to his ex-wife and vice versa. I sent an email last night and he replied "Can you also send this to Johnny's mom?" This happens pretty frequently.

In the future we are copying both parents, but is it unusual for divorced parents to be this stubborn about not discussing how to coparent?

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the BSA's program is **** and we don't use it to communicate. We copy both parents on everything.

THE_CHOSEN_ONE said:

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EFE said:

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THE_CHOSEN_ONE said:

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When I left my wife I cut off all communication with both her and the kids. It's much better in the long run to just rip off the band aid and start over fresh.

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How are things down in Boquillas these days?

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Not too bad, I can't complain.

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Y yo, tambien muchacho.

diehard03 said:

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I do a lot of work with my son's BSA Troop and have to send out emails via a platform that has everyone's address in the database. Long story short is that because of how our email blast platform is set up, most emails go to the dad and only sometimes the mom. I am addressing that technical aspect with our communication volunteer. But the dad seems to be in capable of forwarding information to his ex-wife and vice versa. I sent an email last night and he replied "Can you also send this to Johnny's mom?" This happens pretty frequently.

In the future we are copying both parents, but is it unusual for divorced parents to be this stubborn about not discussing how to coparent?

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the BSA's program is **** and we don't use it to communicate. We copy both parents on everything.

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Our system is not officially part of BSA.

FIDO*98* said:

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I've been married 21 years and want both of us copied on most communication whether school, sports, or organizations. It just makes live easier and ensures we don't overlook anything

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This. We're still happily married, but we are both on all lists. School/teachers, sports.

hay demasiados gringos en este pueblo

I've had that when coaching my kids sports teams, one of them inevitably tries to give me a sob story, and I cut it off immediately and say, I'm a volunteer, not a counselor, I don't need all these details, just a phone number/email.

Dan_the_Enchanter said:

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Buddy of mine married and divorced the same women twice. First time the divorce was not amicable; the second time, it was amicable.

That being said, it is his opinion that the second time when they both "acted like adults" and put their kids as first as they could, was better for everyone.

That being said, I dont anything about this. Hope you get some answers that help.

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That's what they want to believe. Unfortunately, kids that go through ugly divorces can have longer term relationship success because they have actually seen a bad relationship and don't just jump ship at the slightest of arguments. We exchange short term success for the kid for long term failure.

JoeAggie5 said:

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I've had that when coaching my kids sports teams, one of them inevitably tries to give me a sob story, and I cut it off immediately and say, I'm a volunteer, not a counselor, I don't need all these details, just a phone number/email.

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I have that going on too. Got a single-parent kid who I started noticing a couple of behavioral issues with (really sensitive, emotionally delayed, self-isolates a lot). Then I noticed he wasn't reading anywhere close to grade level. I brought it up with the leadership team who directed me to meet confidentially with his mother (not that kind of "confidential". We had some other mutual friends in the meeting for keep everything on the up-and-up). Turns out he is on the spectrum and is severely behind in school. I am not totally convinced it is a kid issue though because his mother is half crazy and I suspect she has a chemical dependency issue. My big problem is that she thought is was OK to just throw him in with the mainstream and not expect us to notice he needed some special attention.

My parents have been married 47 years and I have to text them both if they both need to know about something--they simply do not coordinate.

Burdizzo said:

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JoeAggie5 said:

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I've had that when coaching my kids sports teams, one of them inevitably tries to give me a sob story, and I cut it off immediately and say, I'm a volunteer, not a counselor, I don't need all these details, just a phone number/email.

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I have that going on too. Got a single-parent kid who I started noticing a couple of behavioral issues with (really sensitive, emotionally delayed, self-isolates a lot). Then I noticed he wasn't reading anywhere close to grade level. I brought it up with the leadership team who directed me to meet confidentially with his mother (not that kind of "confidential". We had some other mutual friends in the meeting for keep everything on the up-and-up). Turns out he is on the spectrum and is severely behind in school. I am not totally convinced it is a kid issue though because his mother is half crazy and I suspect she has a chemical dependency issue. My big problem is that she thought is was OK to just throw him in with the mainstream and not expect us to notice he needed some special attention.

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In my experience there are a number of people who use Scouting to try and mainstream their kid that is somewhat challenged.

They aren't cut out for sports or that crowd. Maybe not musically inclined. Don't fit in at school. Scouts is a way to get them in with other kids and get outdoors.

Sometimes it works.

In the old days we called them nerds. Yeah, I noticed a lot of them since I started working with scouts. Interesting trend I noticed is that the "cool kids" drift away for other extracurricular activities, and the nerds are the ones the make Eagle.

That said we have one kid who can probably blaze whatever path he decides. He is good at band, plays sports, and is a great public speaker. Not surprising his dad is a retired USAF pilot.

I am sure that is what you want to believe.

Their kids have experienced both an amicable divorce and an unamicable divorce, so they should be OK either way.

Burdizzo said:

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In the old days we called them nerds. Yeah, I noticed a lot of them since I started working with scouts. Interesting trend I noticed is that the "cool kids" drift away for other extracurricular activities, and the nerds are the ones the make Eagle.

That said we have one kid who can probably blaze whatever path he decides. He is good at band, plays sports, and is a great public speaker. Not surprising his dad is a retired USAF pilot.

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Yeah, I've seen that.

The athletic kids get too busy with baseball and football and wrestling and soccer and swimming. Swimming isn't too much of an interference since they tend to practice early before school.

You gotta get most of those kids to Eagle before the fumes hit. The car exhaust fumes and the perfumes. It's hard to keep them on track once they get a whiff of those.