In honor of our favorite topic today...i thought it would be great to start a thread about the Listeater...just add in if you can...I thought this would be a great thread to create a script for the Listeater...


(Seinfeld's apartment)

[George rushes in]
George: I just saw the craziest thing today...Unlike anything you have ever seen before

Jerry: what is it???

George: It will blow your mind Jerry...It will blow it right off..

Jerry: OK WHat is it???

George: It is so far out there...it is too hard to comprehend...Sort of like men being leads in feminine hygiene commercials...

Jerry: FOR THE LOVE OF PETE...WHAT IS IT!?!?!?!

George: Ok...I am standing in line for tickets and we have a list Jerry...a list that has everyone in order to get tickets...Well out of nowhere comes this whale of a woman...She was 10 stories high if she was a foot...And she gave out a loud bellow and I said easy big fellow...and she ate the list Jerry...she ate it all...

Elaine: I ate a list once.

George: You ate a list?

Jerry: A list Elaine?

Elaine: Yep. I was standing in line one day, yada, yada, yada, boy that list was good.

[This message has been edited by um-yeah (edited 12/9/2004 12:26p).]

That wasn't a lady, it was NNNEEEWWWWMMMMAAAANNNN!



[This message has been edited by IVHorsemen (edited 12/9/2004 12:28p).]

"No tickets for you!"

I seriously hope the Batt covers this.

Then Crazy Joe Davola walks up, guns them all down, and the episode is over.

quote:

---

She was 10 stories high if she was a foot

---

And she had these Man Hands Jerry.

The crazy thing was that she at her list one at a time. She scooped the corn, but not the list. Thats what makes it so vexing.

I also heard she's a close-talker and wears puffy shirts!

That list is making me thirsty!

It goes to prove.........people love lists.

Her lists are real and they're SPECTACULAR!!

"It's a Listivus for the rest of us!" /Frank Costanza

not that theres anything wrong with that!!!!!!

not that theres anything wrong with that!!!!!!

I saw it.

She dipped the list. Took a bite...

And then dipped the list again.

[/Newman] When you control the lists...you control information...

Because this...



Should not be confused with that...




[This message has been edited by um-yeah (edited 12/9/2004 1:33p).]

then commenced the airing of greivances....followed by the feats of strength.

As George, Elaine, and Jerry are discussing list-eaters, Kramer walks in and starts rustling through Jerry's refrigerator and says, "Oh yeah my friend Bob Saccamanno eats lists all the time. His holistic doctor turned him on to it. You know Jerry, you should really consider something like that yourself."

OR

Steinbrenner calls George into his Yankee Stadium office: "Costanza, I hear you witnessed some kind of woman eating a list."

George: "Yes sir, I..."

Steinbrenner: "George, do you realize the magnitude of the possibilities here? That paper's gotta have all kinds of fiber in it, and Tartabull and O'Neill's bats could definitely use the benefit of some fiber. You're on to something here, kid. I SMELL A PEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNANNNNNNNNNNNNNNTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!"

So we needed to get the list back.....she had to regurgitate it.....they needed help, so finally they asked....Is anyone here a marine biologist?

I heard the list she ate was once owned by actor Jon Voight.

David Petterman: Elaine is the list still "with you?"

Elaine: Urg... yeah...

Petterman: Do you know what a list that's hundreds of years old will do to your stomach? That'll be punishment enough... Good Day!

I was handcuffed to the bed, in my underwear, where I remained...She was attractive. She was, also, in fact, a Nazi...The water that I had been swiming in was very cold. And, when I dropped the towel, there was significant shrinkage...Her parents were looking at me. So, there I was, with a marble rye hanging from the end of a fishing pole...In closing, these stories have not been embellished, because they need no embellishment. They are simply, horrifyingly, the story of my life as a short, stocky, slow-witted bald man. Thank you...Oh, also, my fiance died from eating a toxic list of students camping out for Cotton Bowl tickets. Thanks again.

Great stuff...

I wonder if the List Eater thought any of you guys were "sponge-worthy."

The camp was angry that day my friends. Like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli.

George: "The Zone Plaza crowd was angry that day, my friends. Like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli."

Was she wearing a "body suit?"